I’ve started planning my trip back to America for the summer. New York City and it’s surrounding areas (two weeks), Chicagoland (less than a week), and New Mexico (solely to see my bfffff) form the current itinerary bones. But I was reticent to finalize all the plans because I’m honestly just wary about it all. I haven’t been home in two years. And America, well…. there are no words for it’s nonsense these days.
And I have to go alone. Bae has wisely decided to spend the time here trying to make money, rather than following along with me and spending a ton of money. And while I get that it’s the only logical choice, it makes me curl my lip like a moody toddler denied her favorite ice cream. I don’t want to be there alone, gawked at by everyone, having to explain the rest of the world to naive Americans, (who would never deign to come visit me, but still resent that I haven’t been back in two years/expect me to move mountains to fit them into my itinerary while they change literally nothing about their routines.) I loved the idea of carting him around and being like, “And for today’s show and tell, a real live Muslim Arab!” And they would all marvel at his beard and his English-speaking and his niceness and his normalness and how nice he smells because of all the perfumes.
Oh well, perhaps next summer he can come with me. And maybe by then I’ll learn some more Arabic and we can gossip about people in front of them. And they will all tilt their heads in wonder at who I have become. And then I will write a book about it. And it will enjoy minimal success because I have zero online following and books are dead, hurrah!
(One of the things I am actually looking forward to about going back to America is the shopping. I’m going to buy a whole new wardrobe and I’m going to bring back enough fake food to last a month and oh the boooooooks! My list of books to buy is going to require me to check a bag on the way back. I never check a bag anymore! But I’ve already started online shopping and shipping things to my mom’s house, haha.)